Temptation, Manipulation, and all the Evil Things.

Out of all the words there are in the English language, none are able to describe how I feel right about now.
I am doing everything right for once, and then one slip of what I want, everything goes down hill. I don't understand how one of the things that I want most in this world can be so.. wrong?
It feels like all the trust people had in me, if they had any just vanished. I don't know if it's because of my age, or my maturity, but it feels as if I'm not ever able to be on the same idk level? as some people. I feel like I'm trailing behind, so what's the point in trying?
After church tonight, my friend and I went to Arby's. Got a lovely phone call and rant from someone, and then almost broke my phone twice.. then again chucking it in a public place can do that. We had an interesting conversation after that, because this special person who was on the phone, was also on speaker! and said some things that should have been kept.. well.. let's just say private. I just don't understand why someone could get so, idk upset or jealous of the fact that I am getting closer to God.. Overall good time with my friend, had a good laugh, and had an few interesting conversations, some that probably shouldn't be repeated.
Car ride home=difficult. It seems like I'm not very vulnerable anymore, but there are certain things that will get me on edge. Picture it as, someone throwing a bunch of rocks at someone, who dodges them very well, up until the point where they trip on one of those rocks, and the rocks just start hitting them. Doesn't sound like I pretty picture does it? Nope!      anyways, I just felt that the weight of this issue on hand, started to get heavier and heavier, to the point where I felt it was best to pull over.. but ignoring that, I tended to go a little faster... or a lot. I cried out to God, knowing it was stupid to question him, I just started stating things. I wanted to curse but I knew it wouldn't do me any good what so ever, so I just started saying grace and praying in the spirit. Well... I got home safe! obviously.. I do feel better, but the weight still feels like 1,000 pounds. I'm missing something, I just don't know what. I guess all I can do is continue to read and study in the word, pray, and thank God.